| Finding Laughter Again |
| © Ferna Lary Mills |
Laughter. That strange emotion that causes us to breathe funny, makes our face
wrinkle upwards, brings funny sounds from our throats and sometimes even causes
tears to roll from our eyes. Sometimes it's brought on simply by a word, or only a look,
or a memory that suddenly comes to mind.
Laughter seems so inappropriate and foreign when we are in such deep stages of
sorrow and grief. Yet laughter is still good for the soul. It allows healing to take place,
stress to be released, and it bonds us together with one another when all of our bonds
seem to have come loose at the seams. Yet, it's so elusive and sometimes even
unthinkable to believe we will ever laugh again.
After my mother died, I was so surprised when laughter came again, for it happened
while preparing to go to her funeral. Yes, it felt so very inappropriate at the time, but it
was good for the soul, and not just for me!
My parents had been divorced for 29 years. Upon learning of my mom's death, my
father drove 1800 miles to be with us kids while we buried our mother. Now, Dad being
a very frugal man, owned only one suit . . . a black tuxedo he bought from Goodwill to
wear to a friends wedding a few years ago. He was quite proud of his tux and bragged
that it cost him only $10. Rather, he paid $6 for the tux and $4 to have it cleaned! He
was so proud of his "bargain"!
When I finished dressing to go to my mother's funeral, I turned to see Dad strutting into
the room in his beautiful $10 tuxedo, complete with tails and a worn red silk rose
attached to the lapel. I'm sorry, but I busted out laughing! We laughed together. Then
we laughed and cried. But the tears washed out our souls and helped us to prepare for
the lengthy and slow healing process. Yes, Dad did wear his tux to her funeral.
However, I gently plucked the fake rose from the lapel and placed it in his pocket.
Only ten short months later, I ended up having to bury my father, too. But the memory
of that tux still brings a grin to my face and a smile to my heart. By the way, we buried
Dad in his favorite suit, but with a real red rose on the lapel. I know he would have been
proud!
~*~
God created rain to make things grow, and then sunshine to dry up the rain. He created
tears to wash away our pain and then laughter to make those tears a distant memory. ~
Ferna
wrinkle upwards, brings funny sounds from our throats and sometimes even causes
tears to roll from our eyes. Sometimes it's brought on simply by a word, or only a look,
or a memory that suddenly comes to mind.
Laughter seems so inappropriate and foreign when we are in such deep stages of
sorrow and grief. Yet laughter is still good for the soul. It allows healing to take place,
stress to be released, and it bonds us together with one another when all of our bonds
seem to have come loose at the seams. Yet, it's so elusive and sometimes even
unthinkable to believe we will ever laugh again.
After my mother died, I was so surprised when laughter came again, for it happened
while preparing to go to her funeral. Yes, it felt so very inappropriate at the time, but it
was good for the soul, and not just for me!
My parents had been divorced for 29 years. Upon learning of my mom's death, my
father drove 1800 miles to be with us kids while we buried our mother. Now, Dad being
a very frugal man, owned only one suit . . . a black tuxedo he bought from Goodwill to
wear to a friends wedding a few years ago. He was quite proud of his tux and bragged
that it cost him only $10. Rather, he paid $6 for the tux and $4 to have it cleaned! He
was so proud of his "bargain"!
When I finished dressing to go to my mother's funeral, I turned to see Dad strutting into
the room in his beautiful $10 tuxedo, complete with tails and a worn red silk rose
attached to the lapel. I'm sorry, but I busted out laughing! We laughed together. Then
we laughed and cried. But the tears washed out our souls and helped us to prepare for
the lengthy and slow healing process. Yes, Dad did wear his tux to her funeral.
However, I gently plucked the fake rose from the lapel and placed it in his pocket.
Only ten short months later, I ended up having to bury my father, too. But the memory
of that tux still brings a grin to my face and a smile to my heart. By the way, we buried
Dad in his favorite suit, but with a real red rose on the lapel. I know he would have been
proud!
~*~
God created rain to make things grow, and then sunshine to dry up the rain. He created
tears to wash away our pain and then laughter to make those tears a distant memory. ~
Ferna
| A Christian Grief Ministry |
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